Wow, what a year! Seriously, everything that passes through my eyes was just a pile of black dusts, every sound that passes through my ears were all noisy and annoying sounds from firecrackers, every smell that passes through my nose was the smell from the rubbish, every food that i taste was the taste of a fresh bitter gourd. Why i do not see any beautiful mountains with waterfall? Hear the sound of the waves hitting the beach? Smell the fresh air on the mountain? Taste the best food like the king? Who am i? I just another boy who is just like another other boys. We have everything the same, 2 hands, 10 fingers, a pair of eyes and etc. But why is our fate differs so much? Why i do not have the opportunity to enjoy your life?
My "Black Year" starts after the Chinese New Year. Yes, Chinese New Year. It should be a very happy and enjoying event where everyone will celebrates with their family for the 15 days. Yes, i did celebrate this event, with my family. We celebrated for 15 days too. But too bad, after the so called enjoying event, a black event takes place. We have lost the pillar of the family, the biggest and strongest pillar in our family. Even though the Pillar has many scratches and small broken pieces, but He still holds our family strongly without any failures. Eventually, He just got taken away on that day, leaving our family half collapsed. I can just barely hold up the family. I have my small tiny salary not even enough to support my own daily spending own studies, and now adding car loans. Can anyone survive in this type of life?
Next, my carelessness, car crash. I kissed someone's backside, and of course i have to pay for it. >.< What a backside, few thousands Ringgit. Then my mom's car have to be overhaul due to my dad's sikap tak apa, trusted his so called good friend to "maintain" the car. Yea, few thousands Ringgit too. Then now my car's ear got rip off by a stupid bus. @.@ Another thousand Ringgit? May i ask, where can i get these few thousands Ringgit??
Few weeks ago, fetched my family to do some personal matter. After that, i know that they are hungry since morning, so i happily but stupidly fetched them to eat something that my mom never tried before. I told them just order anything you want. Does this shows that i am good or stupid? But i feel happy and not sad because of the bill. Unfortunately, what i get back? When i discuss with my mom on my car's ear matter. She asked why am i so angry about this car. I told him that of course i will be paying for the repair because i am the second but weak pillar and it will cause hundreds or maybe thousands. You may never guessed what is her reply, "Of course, this is the reason why i have fed you for so long." Is this what a mom can say to her son that is trying his very best to support the family? I am going to lose my direction soon. Or maybe this is my FATE? Not loved by anyone.
-StevenS-
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